Celery Juicer 9000
It juices celery. That's it.
A single-purpose gag toy that juices celery, taken absurdly seriously.
A friend dared me to make an app that juices celery. I wanted to find out how straight I could play a joke — whether a product with exactly one pointless function could still feel like a real product.
The hard part of a gag is restraint. Every instinct says add a second button, a settings menu, a reason. The moment it does two things, the joke dies. It has to do one thing, completely, and never wink at you.
I built the packaging, not the payload. Real product chrome — a serious name, a version number, a loading state, a genuinely satisfying juice — wrapped around a function that does nothing useful. All the comedy lives in how sincerely it's engineered.
It juices celery. That's it. That's the product. No settings, no upsell, no second feature — and it never breaks character.
Devlog
live from git- Add Celery Juicer 9000 landing page
Knowing what to leave out is the whole job. This proves I can hold a scope, sweat the polish on the one thing that matters, and ship something that feels complete instead of piling on features.